Severed Ties Are Stronger Than Stones

Quote of the day: What are the gods if not love?

They really are.

Today, I messaged an old friend on MSN. I was in a joyful, sociable mood at that moment, but things sort of got out of hand.

He said he didn't remember me.

For once, I thought that it was his sister using the computer, but after several pokes and interrogations, I realized it was really him. He was, like, playing the "who-are-you-game". I really thought it was a game.

I thought he was having a form of crisis of something, but he refused to admit a thing. He just typed, and I quote, "nothing that concerns you". Just like that. And I asked him, "so your past 17 years of childhood is of no more importance to you?" He just went, "yes." When I tried my luck and poushed him with a "why?", he went ballistic, typing expletives in complete UPPERCASE. I was beyond shocked.

This is seriously the first time where I had heartache for a lost of a friend (and I'm hoping he isn't, lost I mean). Many times I have just forgotten and stepped away from my friends. There were just too many good memories, too many good times and bad times spent together. Severed ties are just painful, much more than being assaulted by a volley of stones.

I question whether it was because I had treated him in a certain way in the past. If I did, I truly regret my actions now. If I didn't, I would still blame myself for being a horrible person I always am.

I didn't know friendship was that powerful. That feeling... My heart tugging on invisible strings, my mind clashing, my thoughts jumbling up in a hurricane of sky and sea.

What have I done? What have I become?